Fantasy football is perhaps the last expression of male chauvinism, a virtual "man cave," played by men, dominated by men, and targeted toward men. Here's how it all came about:
THE RISE IN FEMALE CHAUVINISM
Title IX, a law that requires equal funding of athletics for men and women at any institution receiving federal funds, spurred the growth of fantasy football as a refuge for men by forcing universities to cut traditional "man cave" sports such as wrestling and baseball in favor of women's bowling and synchronized swimming.
Wanting to be politically correct, networks jumped on the bandwagon and started televising women's college basketball and the women's World Cup. Men's professional leagues joined in, led by the NBA's subsidizing a professional women's basketball league and jamming it down our throats during NBA telecasts.
It wasn't long before women started showing up at local playgrounds and area rec centers demanding equal access to the "man cave" - known as the basketball court. This was soon followed by co-ed flag football and co-ed softball leagues. Female golfers Anika Sorenstam and Michelle Wie gained entry into PGA tournaments and soon the "man cave" known as the golf course became infested with women too. Man caves were becoming extinct.
Then along came the Internet.
VIRTUAL MAN CAVES
A virtual man cave is a place where men can express their male pride without fear of reprisal. Because very few accessible man caves exist in the real world, men have been forced to rely on the "virtual man cave," a place that exists in the realm of thought and attitude, making it a portable safe haven for men who want to be men.
The ultimate "virtual man cave" exists. It's called fantasy football.
It all begins with a man cave party called the draft: 8-12 men gather at local sports bars, eat pizza, and debate the merits of Cincinnati's place kicker and Tampa Bay 's second string fullback. It has been reported that men become insulated from nagging, brow-beating, and other destructive female chauvinistic behaviors for days following a fantasy football draft.
It continues during the fall and into the winter, with men spending an average of three to six hours per week online, researching statistics, making roster changes, and humiliating friends on online message boards. It doesn't matter how bad things are at home. In the "man cave" chat rooms, it's all about the scoreboard.
It all ends with one champion who earns "man cave" bragging rights for an entire year.
CONCLUSION
Preserve the man cave! If a woman tries to sneak into your fantasy football league, kick her out. Title IX doesn't apply to fantasy sports.
NCAAWomen's Bowling Championship Preview:
ESPNFantasyFootball: http://games.espn.go.com/frontpage/football